Should I stay or should I go?
Are you questioning whether to stay or go in your relationship (whether friend, lover, or family)?
This is a common challenge, as all relationships will call us to grow. Growing is uncomfortable, messy, at times painful... and always asks us to let go of something while becoming something more. Is this a true call to end things? Or is this simply a growth edge?
It’s easy to mistake the growth edges as endings. It’s also common (especially for those of us who are down for the work!) to mistake unhealthy, non-supportive patterns as “growth edges.”
Here are some good questions to ask yourself if you are struggling to find clarity …
Is this relationship creating a more authentic version of me? (After conflict and repair, do I expand more into my authentic self, or do I feel the call to dim my light/ compromise core values?)
Is this relationship supporting me in becoming more of what I desire to be? (More loving, accepting, soft/strong, empowered, boundaried, etc…)
Are my deepest desires possible with this person?
Does my body feel safe with this person?
*Did you answer no to any of the above? If so, it might be the time to consider ending this relationship.
Does staying in this relationship require me to violate a personal boundary?
To stay in this relationship, will I have to compromise my integrity in any way/shape or form?
*Did you answer yes to any of the above? If so, it might be the time to consider ending this relationship.
And still… even if you can see the writing on the wall, relationships have medicine for us, and sometimes ask us to stay until we have truly digested the medicine offered. If this is you, you can ALWAYS ASK FOR HELP.
Turn within, ask for the help that you need. You will receive your answer.
If you could use private support, you can find out more about me and my work here.